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First of all, I am so sorry for missing Saturday. I had to take an impromptu trip and neglected it completely.

Saturday's task was to send postcards to five friends – make sure they're people you really want to hear from. If you don't have five addresses that fit the bill, send postcards to authors or artists you like.

For Sunday, Cameron asks you to be a source of abundance and make room in your life for more of what you want. Is there something in your living or working space you can give away? Pass on something you have to someone you think would like it.

If you're not perpetually burdened with objects like everyone in Cameron's imaginary audience, give someone a story you thought was interesting or a (sincere) compliment instead.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Today, Cameron suggests that you bake something – bread, cake, brownies from a mix-- anything that you can make in a relatively short time. If you don't want to turn on the oven, make a fruit salad. If you're not in the mood for anything sweet, try making a soup or a savory pie.

If this is financially or temporally impractical, or if you're already the main cook for your household and you're really tired of it, today might be a good day to spend an extra 2-5 minutes on something you enjoy, but don't get to do as much as you like -- refer to previous lists if extant. Drawing on scrap paper or listening to a piece of music you like are two bite-sized possibilities.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Have there been any new changes in your home environment or your perspective on it? Any new, even outlandish, ideas about what you would love to do with these aspects of your life? If you like the image file idea, find images of these and add to your file.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Your task today and Wednesday, if you're up to it (and as always, no need to say what you've done or whether you've done it), is to find five pretty or interesting rocks. "I enjoy this exercise," Cameron says, "particularly because rocks can be carried in pockets, fingered in business meetings. They can be small, constant reminders of our creative consciousness." Replace rocks with other small pocket-sized objects if you prefer. You do not need to keep them past the end of the week, or really at all.

Later, pick five flowers or leaves, or other living or recently living things from nature. Did you learn in kindergarten how to press them between wax paper and preserve them? Try doing it again – or make crayon rubbings of leaves. If you don't want to damage living things, try preserving plants by drawing them, potting them if you have space and equipment, writing a song about them, or in some other way.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Ok, so. I know I said I would keep my grubby atheist mitts off the Spiritual Path posts, but I'm going back on my promise for just a minute because I want to be clear about one thing. This chapter is chock-full of quotations from and allusions to a very sketchy genre of writing in which money naturally flows toward people who have the "right" spiritual and emotional alignments, and "money will come when you are doing the right thing." These quotes aren't particularly central to the chapter, but they're all over it and I really wish they weren't.

This is not the way our economy works and it is irresponsible to pretend that it is.

If you're poor or broke right now, it is not because you didn't place enough trust in the benevolence of the universe, because you failed to visualize your dreams, or because you blocked the natural flow of monetary energy with your negative commie thoughts. At the very least, there are other factors at work.

This is not a blanket diss on positive thinking as a practice. Clarifying your goals to yourself CAN help you achieve them. Working through your attitudes toward money CAN help you get more of it (for example, if you have blocks about saving money or asking for a raise). Doing what you love instead of what you think you ought to do CAN have financial payoffs, sometimes more quickly than you expect (and sometimes not). Anything that clears your head and decreases stress can have positive effects that are wide-ranging and deep, and might include being better able to make and manage money.

But the idea that "money is God in action" or "a golden flowing stream of concretized vital energy" (both quoted passages appearing in the margins of this chapter) is neither true nor kind, and I can't sign on for it, even by passively not including it here. Money is just money. Economic systems are not karmic systems. I am going to chalk this one up to "Julia Cameron's unexamined class privilege" and move on.

A couple of better ideas below:

This week, in your morning pages, write about the god you do believe in and the god you would like to believe in. For some of us, this means, "What if God's a woman and she's on my side?" For others, it is a god of energy. For still others, a collective of higher forces moving us toward our higher good. If you are still dealing with a god consciousness that has remained unexamined since childhood, you are probably dealing with a toxic god. What would a nontoxic god think of your creative goals? Might such a god really exist? [. . .]

( Many of us equate difficulty with virtue )

In addition to the morning pages direction above, for this week's tasks, Cameron encourages us to look out for "[a]ny new flow in your life" and to "[p]ractice saying yes to freebies" (114) She also suggests that we

Reread the Basic Principles (See page 3.) Do this once daily. Read an Artist's Prayer-- yours from Week Four or mine on pages 207-208. Do this once daily.

Wow, do I ever have mixed feelings about this chapter. This is a hard one for me to approach, because I feel like there's a lot of good and bad mixed in together. Here's a summary of sorts (reprinted and adapted from

alexconnal)

Luxury, says Cameron, is a thing we often deny ourselves because it is too expensive. Time to do art is a thing we often consider a luxury. Most of us think work should be work, not play, and if we want to do it, it is a frivolity.

Cameron says that we must have a little luxury to create art. It doesn't need to be much luxury—see Emma Goldman's quote up top—perhaps a twenty-dollar magazine subscription, or a couple-dollar basket of raspberries, or a wildflower in a cup on the table, free. Cameron describes people whose luxuries are new fun music, new watercolors; she might add that free time and space can be a luxury. One must be able to enjoy life, one must be able to enjoy art; one must do self-care.

Even if all the space we get for ourselves is a bookshelf and a windowsill, even if all the time we get for ourselves is fifteen minutes for morning pages and ten minutes to relax in the bathtub after work, we need the luxury of that space, we need the luxury of that time.

Cameron's exercise for the week is to track "every penny" of how and where you spend your money, and she suggests you keep it up for a month or more. The point is to observe yourself, not to judge yourself; to observe what you spend money on that you don't truly need or want and what you don't spend money on that you truly do.

We've talked before about how unexamined class privilege sometimes clouds Cameron's advice, and I feel like this is an example. This exercise is not going to make sense for everyone. If you don't have enough money to spend money on things you don't need or want, I don't know that it will do much good to remind yourself of it with extra bookkeeping. I am in this position currently, but I'll be trying the money-tracking exercise anyway this week to see how it pans out.

If having and spending money isn't a relevant issue for you, you might think of other resources that you have and spend – time, energy, emotion – that it might be worthwhile to record without judgement.

Don't forget to go on a date with your artist sometime this week and do your morning pages every day!

"Honestly, my favorite creative block is. . . "

What's your favorite thing to do instead of making art? It doesn't have to be something you don't think you should do – having friends over, watching TV, reading, cooking for others, helping other people with their creative blocks – all these things are great, and that's why they're favorites. What's yours?

Think about the payoffs or benefits you get from being blocked. Even if you can't draw, draw yourself happily indulging in your favorite creativity-blocking activity.

How about those morning pages? I wrote mine on the subway yesterday. Usually I'm squeamish about writing in such close quarters, but today it was fine, for some reason.

“Ten ways I am mean to myself are. . . “

Cameron believes that making both positive desires and negative feelings and actions explicit can help us clarify them, the better to point us in the right direction. If you tend to be unkind to yourself, count the ways. You can draw these ways or collect images to represent them.

Did you do your morning pages today?

“Ten items I would like to own, but I don't are. . .”

Cameron sometimes presents these exercises as motivational and/or related in some way to prodding “the universe” into action, which I'm extremely not on board with.

I'd prefer to think of them as identity clarification. For example, I'd like to own a small Mystique figurine because I love the character Mystique from X-Men. I don't think I ought to take out any loans to make this happen, but writing it down is a way of enjoying the wish without pressure. I might also take this opportunity to write about why I relate to Mystique, or something like that.

The things you want don't have to be super significant or meaningful, though. They can be just things that you would like to own.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Pre-posted in preparation for not being near a computer:

“If I were older and had money” List five postponed pleasures, requiring money or otherwise. Collect these images for your file.

Did you do your morning pages today?

NOTE: I have to pre-post a couple of days since I'll be traveling and unable to get to a computer. I apologize for any confusion. Here's Wednesday:

Imagine a scenario:

"If I were younger and had money . . ." List five adventures you would embark on desires you'd indulge. They don't have to require money if they don't. Add images of these to your file if you're doing the file.

How are the morning pages going?

I'm going to be traveling for the next few days. Since Dreamwidth doesn't allow me to schedule posts (that I can tell), this may mean that I'll have to put several days up at once in order not to fall behind. I apologize for any confusion this may cause.

Your task today, if you're up to it (and as always, no need to say what you've done or whether you've done it), is to start an image file. "If I had either faith or money, I would try..." List five. Then keep an eye out for images of these desires. When you see them, cut them out, photograph them, draw them, or otherwise make the image your own. Cameron suggests that you continue to add to this file for the rest of the twelve weeks.

Did you do your morning pages today?

One of the chief barriers to accepting God's generosity is our limited notion of what we are in fact able to accomplish.

( Scarcity Thinking )

( The Virtue Trap )

If you have trouble believing in a supportive God, try this exercise:

“The reason I can't really believe in a supportive God is. . . “ List five grievances. (God can take it)

(p. 103)

We are traditionally rather proud of ourselves for having slipped creative work in there between the domestic chores and obligations. I'm not sure we deserve such big A-pluses for that. —Toni Morrison

Nobody objects to a woman being a good writer or sculptor or geneticist if at the same time she manages to be a good wife, good mother, good-looking, good-tempered, well-groomed, and unaggressive. —Leslie M. McIntyre

Toni Morrison has my number. I am constantly giving myself a giant A-plus for having no time to write, and it's no good.

Cameron's topics this week include what she calls the "virtue trap". She says a very common reason for maintaining a creative block is the need, or desire, to avoid "what would X think?" where X is a spouse, family member, or friend. For a lot of people, sacrificing something of our own time for the benefit of others can feel selfless or virtuous, and that feeling, or the need to avoid feeling selfish, can be very compelling.

Because of this, we might be reluctant to set aside time for fear of being selfish, or of losing the feeling of virtue that comes from never having time. We might even be reluctant to compromise where compromise is possible.

One of Cameron's examples is a woman who wants to take pottery classes, but it would mean missing some of her son's baseball practices. Instead of taking the classes and attending as many of the practices as she can without missing class, or even taking some classes and only skipping a few practices, she skips the classes entirely to attend all the practices, and pushes the pottery classes into the category of things she would like to do if supporting her son didn't come first.

At some point in your creative life, Cameron says, you will have to be selfish. Try not to be afraid.

Being afraid to be selfish can be a kind of self-destruction. Organizing our lives without care for our creative self is a kind of self-destruction. Many of the tasks in Week 5 focus on possibilities that we have relegated to the past (when we were young and stupid) or to the future (when we're older and have more money or fewer responsibilities). We're encouraged to bring these possibilities back into the present.

Cameron has three quizzes in this chapter:
The Virtue-Trap Quiz:
1) The biggest lack in my life is _____.
2) The greatest joy in my life is _____.
3) My largest time commitment is _____.
4) As I play more, I work _____.
5) I feel guilty that I am _____.
6) I worry that _____.
7) If my dreams come true, my family will _____.
8) I sabotage myself so people will _____.
9) If I let myself feel it, I'm angry that I _____.
10) One reason I get sad sometimes is _____.

Leading into the second quiz, Cameron says one of the things blocked creatives often do is say no to ourselves in many small and large ways.

Forbidden Joys: List ten things you love and would love to do but do not feel allowed to do. Post the list somewhere highly visible.

Wish List: List nineteen things you wish, as serious or frivolous as you like but list them as fast as possible, and a twentieth thing you most especially wish.

Don't forget to go on a date with your artist sometime this week and do your morning pages every day!

Take a look at your living and creative space. Is there any area that you could convert into a private space for yourself? Cameron suggests hanging a sheet on the ceiling to convert the corner of a room into a “dream area.” She suggests “a chair or pillow, something to write on, some kind of little altar area for flowers and candles.”

If you already have a good private space, you can do one thing to improve it, or just hang out there for a while since you're way ahead of us.

If this isn't feasible or desirable, try improving your existing space in some way. Clear off a desk, put some flowers in a cup, stick a picture or some cards to the wall, or make some space on the floor. If all your spaces are shared, what can you do to personalize your creative time?

Did you do your morning pages today?

Are there burdensome objects in your life? Clothes that make you feel ugly but take up space in your cupboards, textbooks from classes you didn't enjoy, research materials for a project you never finished, fabric or busted jeans kept against the day when you could afford a sewing machine, heirlooms or gifts you don't really like?

Objects like this can be hard to let go of because they represent an aspiration or a hope, but they also take up space and make us feel defeated. There will be other outfits, other fabric scraps, other books. Pick one thing that is burdensome and give it away, sell it, or toss it. Art supplies can go to after-school programs and art camps, clothes to thrift and consignment stores if they're in good condition (or to animal shelters if they're not).

If you don't have any burdensome objects in your life, look at one situation in your life that you feel you should and can change, but haven't yet. What benefit do you get from not changing this situation? Is there a small change you can make this week that will take you in the right direction?

On a personal note, today I get to do reading deprivation while minding a bookstore! I am very excited for the impending end of reading deprivation.

Did you do your morning pages?

Plan an extended artist's date – either a whole day or half a day, depending on your time and obligations. If you can make this happen this weekend, great! If not, plan for as soon as possible.

If you can't manage an extended date within the next couple of weeks, could you do two smaller dates in the same weekend? Take some time to think about the things you'd like to do.

Use this space to discuss your experience of artist's dates so far, if you like. What have you been doing and planning?

Did you do your morning pages today?

Your task today, if you're up to it (and as always, no need to say what you've done or whether you've done it), is to remember yourself at eight. (If anyone in the group is currently eight or under, read: at half the age you are now). What did you like to do? What were your favorite things? Now, write a letter from you at eight to you at your current age. What would you tell yourself?

I barely remember myself at eight at all. Myself at ten or eleven is much clearer (though significantly more of a mess), so that's who'll write the letter. Unless I invent a fictional character called “myself at eight,” which I guess I could do.

Did you do your morning pages today?

Your task today, if you're up to it (and as always, no need to say what you've done or whether you've done it), is to describe yourself ten to sixty years in the future. Choose a future age that appeals to you. What are you like? What did you do when you were older than you are now that you enjoyed? Be very specific.

Now, write a letter from your future self to you at your current age. What would you tell yourself? What interests would you urge yourself to pursue? What dreams would you encourage?

The original version of this task was “describe yourself at eighty” but it's positioned as a future-looking-back and I don't like to make too many assumptions. I'm planning to maybe do a “creative cluster” group later in the fall and I know at least one of the people who expressed interest is pretty close to eighty already.

Did you do your morning pages today?